The Hand Turkey is Back in Fifth Place
From fifth to third and back to fifth. I guess I don’t understand SEO. How could my hand turkey be doing so well one minute and so bad the next?
Here’s what I’ve done to help this hand turkey over the last 24 hours:
- Wrote five posts about this hand turkey (including this one)
- Hyper-linked the words hand turkey every time I typed the words hand turkey
- Posted a link to this hand turkey blog on Facebook
What am I forgetting?
FYI, here is the hand turkey:
It’s almost Thanksgiving and instead of complaining about my hand turkey not being ranked number one, I’d like to take a moment to be grateful for the fact that it’s ranked in the top ten out of all the hundreds of thousands of hand turkeys across the globe. Sometimes I need to stop and appreciate all the hand turkeys I’ve defeated instead of obsessing about the four shitty hand turkeys that are blocking my path to the number one spot.
Thank you, hand turkey:
How Are We Doing On Bing?
This website is primarily concerned with Google Image rankings, but it’s only fair to check in with other search engines from time to time.
According to Bing, my turkey ranks a pathetic seventh. What a terrible search engine.
Why Is The Best Hand Turkey Stuck In Fifth Place?
The best hand turkey has been ranked as high as third, but it’s never been able to crack the number one spot. It’s been stuck in fifth place for the last year. What the fuck?
THIS Is The Number One Hand Turkey? Really?
As of October 4, 2012, this is the number one hand turkey on the internet:
Are you kidding me? That hand turkey sucks.
This is my turkey, which currently ranks fifth:
If you ask me, this hand turkey is the best hand turkey on the internet, hands down.
This Hand Turkey Looks Realistic
If a hand turkey was real, I imagine it would look like this hand turkey.