The Hand Turkey is Back in Fifth Place

From fifth to third and back to fifth. I guess I don’t understand SEO. How could my hand turkey be doing so well one minute and so bad the next? 

Here’s what I’ve done to help this hand turkey over the last 24 hours: 

What am I forgetting?

FYI, here is the hand turkey:

hand turkey

It’s been a huge day. My hand turkey moved from fifth to third place over the course of eight hours. [Updated as of 7:04 PST, 11/13/12]
Tell your family, tell your friends. The hand turkey is gaining ground.

It’s been a huge day. My hand turkey moved from fifth to third place over the course of eight hours. [Updated as of 7:04 PST, 11/13/12]

Tell your family, tell your friends. The hand turkey is gaining ground.

Happy Thanksgiving

It’s almost Thanksgiving and instead of complaining about my hand turkey not being ranked number one, I’d like to take a moment to be grateful for the fact that it’s ranked in the top ten out of all the hundreds of thousands of hand turkeys across the globe. Sometimes I need to stop and appreciate all the hand turkeys I’ve defeated instead of obsessing about the four shitty hand turkeys that are blocking my path to the number one spot.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Thank you, hand turkey:

Hand Turkey

How Are We Doing On Bing?

Not well.

This website is primarily concerned with Google Image rankings, but it’s only fair to check in with other search engines from time to time.

According to Bing, my turkey ranks a pathetic seventh. What a terrible search engine. 

Bing Results

I can’t catch a break! My hand turkey dropped back to fifth place. [rankings as of November 13, 2012]

I can’t catch a break! My hand turkey dropped back to fifth place. [rankings as of November 13, 2012]

Boom!
As of October 21, 2012, my hand turkey is ranked fourth in the world according to Google Images. The turkey that had been ranked first dropped all the way to fifth place. 
At this stage of the game, it’s about who wants it the most. 

Boom!

As of October 21, 2012, my hand turkey is ranked fourth in the world according to Google Images. The turkey that had been ranked first dropped all the way to fifth place. 

At this stage of the game, it’s about who wants it the most. 

Why Is The Best Hand Turkey Stuck In Fifth Place?

The best hand turkey has been ranked as high as third, but it’s never been able to crack the number one spot. It’s been stuck in fifth place for the last year. What the fuck?

THIS Is The Number One Hand Turkey? Really?

As of October 4, 2012, this is the number one hand turkey on the internet:

wack turkey

Are you kidding me? That hand turkey sucks.

This is my turkey, which currently ranks fifth:

Hand Turkey

If you ask me, this hand turkey is the best hand turkey on the internet, hands down. 

This Hand Turkey Looks Realistic

If a hand turkey was real, I imagine it would look like this hand turkey.

Hand Turkey